Wade shrugged. "Not much, I guess." He sounded sad to Justin.

"Something wrong?" Justin asked, slipping an arm around Wade's waist and leaning into him.

Wade shrugged, but didn't give Justin an answer.

Looking at Wade curiously, Justin frowned slightly. "You sure?"

"Yes, Justin," Wade said, irritation creeping into his voice. Taking the hint to back off, Justin just nodded and pulled himself away from Wade just a little bit.

Wade sighed. "I'm sorry, J. Please, don't... I just... had a really bad day."

Justin nodded, still not moving back. "Do you... wanna talk about it?"

Wade shook his head. "I just want to forget about it. Please... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"You didn't. I just... if you need space, you can have it."

Wade shook his head. "No, not from you."

Justin nodded and moved back to his original position.

Wade smiled slightly. "This is nice."

"It is," Justin said with a nod of agreement.

They sat together for a few minutes, before Justin, curious and worried, just couldn't hold it in anymore. "Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?"

"Justin! God!" Wade exclaimed, pulling away from Justin and standing up. "What is your problem?"

"I'm just... I'm worried about you, and I want to help."

"You can help," Wade said slowly, "by leaving the subject alone. Do you think you can do that?"

Trying not to let the sarcasm in Wade's voice get to him, Justin simply nodded for what seemed to be the tenth time in the past five minutes.

Suddenly remorseful again, Wade sat back down. "J, God, I am so sorry, I don't know what's gotten into me today, I just..."

Justin shook his head. "It's ok, Wade. Just... if you need to talk, you know I'm here," he said softly.

Looking at Justin, seeing the sadness in his eyes, Wade was suddenly overcome with guilt. "God, I... you know, sometimes I don't know why you even love me at all."

Getting up, Wade hurried out of the room, leaving a baffled Justin behind, watching him go.

When Wade woke up the next morning, he noticed that Justin wasn't in bed beside him. That Justin's side of the bed hadn't even been slept on.

"Fuck," he said quietly. "Why was I such an ass to him? I must have made him feel so bad. I'm so... God, I-" before he could finish berating himself, he noticed a piece of paper on Justin's pillow. Fearing the worst, he picked it up.

It was a list.

Skimming over it, Wade realized Justin had written him a list of reasons why he loved him. There were ten.

1. I love your kind personality and beautiful heart

"I was thinking about setting up a charity, like you did. Only instead of helping music programs in schools, it would help school dance programs. I know that there are some kids out there who don't get a chance to have a dance program in their school, and you know, everyone should have the chance. I mean, those things are important too, right? "

Justin smiled. "I think so."

"So you don't think it's a bad idea then?" Wade asked.

Justin shook his head, still smiling. "No, not at all. I think it's a really good idea."

Wade smiled, and then almost sheepishly asked, "So... would you help me? You know, get it started?"

Justin grinned. "What, like be the first to donate?"

Wade laughed. "No, you little punk. I meant, you know... well... you know!"

Justin smiled. "I do know. And yes, I would love to help you get started."

Going over to Justin, Wade gave him a big hug. "I have the best boyfriend in the world."

"Second best," Justin said with a smile.

2. I love the way you laugh

They were laying in bed together, limbs tangled, sheets rumpled, Justin's head on Wade's chest, his finger tracing random patterns on his stomach.

"I love the moments like these," Wade said.

"Me too," Justin told him, lightly stroking the tiny hairs on Wade's stomach with his fingers.

Wade chuckled lightly. "Does that tickle?" Justin asked with a grin, and Wade nodded.

"Good," Justin said, before attacking Wade's stomach with both his hands.

"Ahh! J! No, no! Ahhh!" Laughing, Wade tired to hold back Justin's hands, but he was laughing too hard to stop him.

"Mercy, mercy! Justin! Ahhh, please... stop!"

Justin grinned and stopped. "Only because you said please."

Wade reached up and pulled Justin down, inches from his face. "You're a little imp, you know that?"

Justin grinned, "But I'm your little imp."

Wade smiled softly. "That you are."

"You can kiss me now," Justin told him, still grinning.

"Sounds like a plan."

3. I love your smile

"This is a good picture of you," Justin said, holding up the picture for Wade to see.

"Ugh. That's horrible, man."

Justin shook his head. "No, not at all. Just look at your smile. It's beautiful."

"J, you're delusional."

"Psh. You're just annoyingly modest." Justin pushed the magazine at Wade's chest.

"Buy that for me."

Wade laughed. "What, no please?"

"Don't make me bring out the pout."

Wade snorted. "I am immune to the pout."

Justin raised an eyebrow. "Oh really now? Well then..." Pulling his best pout, Justin looked at Wade with his most pathetic puppy face. "Please... will you buy me that magazine with the really cute picture of you?"

"Damn it," Wade muttered, reaching into his pocket for a five dollar bill as Justin grinned triumphantly.

"I hope you're happy now," he said, holding the money and the magazine out to Justin.

"Oh no," Justin said, stepping back. "You have to buy it for me."

Wade gave Justin an exasperated look and headed for checkout, muttering about Justin's damn pout routine being so adorable. Grinning, Justin followed him.

Wade stood in line, a slight scowl on his face, and Justin had to fight back laughter.

"I want to see this smile," Justin said, pointing to the picture, "right now."

"Give me a reason to smile like that," Wade told him.

Justin looked at him with a soft smile and said, "I love you like I have never loved anyone before. You've captured my heart and touched my soul, and I hope that you stay with me for the rest of my life because I don't know if I know how to live without you anymore."

And Wade smiled.

4. I love the way your hand fits perfectly into mine

"Holding hands is like an art form," Justin said, studying their connected hands.

"Oh? How so?" Wade asked, amused.

"Because, there's so many different ways to do it. Like... you can have it just plain palm-to-palm, or you can have your fingers laced together. You could have it so the palm of one person's hand is resting on the back of the other person's, with laced fingers. Or you could just like... hold fingers, when both people bend their fingers and then kinda connect them... sort of like this..." Justin then took their hands and proceeded to show Wade, who was just looking at Justin with a smile.

After a moment, Justin looked at Wade. "What? Why are you looking at me like that? What did I do?"

"Nothing. You just... you're so cute."

Justin made a face. "I am not."

Wade grinned. "Are so."

"Am not."

"Are so."

"Am NOT!"

Wade then put Justin‘s hand back into his like it was before Justin had started his demonstration, still grinning. "Are so." He then brought Justin's hand up to his lips and kissed it gently.

That was the end of that argument.

5. I love how you can make everything better, no matter what

Justin looked at the magazine sadly, reading the harsh, critical words of the reporter over again.

Wade frowned slightly. “It isn’t true, you know.”

Justin just shrugged, still looking down at the magazine.

“J… you’re a beautiful, kind, smart person. The person who wrote those things about you… they don’t know the real you. They only know what they choose to see.”

“I try not to let this stuff get to me, you know? But sometimes it’s just… hard.”

Wrapping his arms around Justin, Wade nodded. “I know, but Justin… those things, in that article? I don’t think them. The guys don’t think them. Your family doesn’t think them. All the people that matter… they know the real you. And that’s what’s most important, right?”

Justin smiled slightly. “Right.”

“Plus, I can go and kick this guy’s ass for you if you wanted. Would that help?”

Justin laughed and Wade smiled. “There’s that laugh, accompanied by your beautiful smile.”

Justin blushed slightly. “I think you’re delusional.”

“I think I’m seeing things perfectly clear.”

Justin sighed softly. “I love you,” he said with a small smile.

“I love you back, Timberlake.”

“You always know just what to say to make me feel better.”

Wade gave him a gentle smile. “I learned from the best, you know.”

And Justin blushed a little deeper.

6. I love how I can see forever in your eyes

“I’m so going to beat you.”

“Not a chance. It’s gonna be me. No pun intended.”

Wade laughed. “Cute. But I’m still going to win.”

“Wade, I have done this with the guys for who knows how long and I always win. You don’t have a chance.”

“We’ll see how cocky you are when you lose, Timberlake.”

Both determined to beat the other, Wade and Justin continued their staring contest, which had been going strong for almost five minutes.

“You’re about to cave,” Wade said.

“Never.”

“I can feel it, J. You’re about to blink. Your eyes are begging for it.”

“Stop it, Wade! You’re cheating.”

“Blink, Justin, blink!”

Justin looked up into Wade’s eyes. “No, I wo-” he stopped, as if he was suddenly captivated. Staring into Wade’s eyes, he found himself almost breathless.

“Tell me what you see,” Wade whispered.

“You… me… forever… it’s endless. It’s like… they don’t stop. I… I could get lost.”

Wade smiled slightly, never breaking his gaze with Justin. Then after a moment, he said, “No fair, you’re going to win at this rate.”

Justin grinned. “I told you I never lose.”

7. I love the way you make me feel like I’m the most important person in the world

Justin looked up, surprise written on his face when he saw that it was Wade who had just entered the hospital waiting room.

“Wade, what are you…”

Wade walked over to Justin and sat down next to him, taking Justin’s hand. “You needed me here.”

“But you have your classes, your party, you…”

Wade put a finger to Justin’s lips. “Shh. I cancelled them. It’s ok. This is more important. How’s your dad doing?”

Justin sighed. “He’s ok. Lisa’s back with him now, he’s out of surgery.”

Wade nodded. When Justin had found out that his father had been rushed to the hospital to have emergency surgery to remove his appendix, Justin had been on the fastest flight to Tennessee to be with his family. At the time, he had told Wade not to worry about coming with him, because Wade had so many commitments that weekend. However, Wade couldn’t help but worrying, and he knew that it had scared Justin more than he cared to admit.

So Wade had cancelled his classes, asked Chantal to host his big party, and gone to Tennessee to be with Justin.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Justin said softly.

Wade held his hand tighter and said, “Where else would I be?”

“I just… you didn’t have to cancel everything just to be here with me. I’m…”

“I wanted to be here. You may not have needed me, but I wanted to be here.”

Justin smiled softly. “Oh trust me, I needed you. I always do.”

Wade brought Justin’s hand to his lips and kissed it. “You’ll always have me.”

Justin smiled. “Thank you for coming out here.”

Wade returned the smile. “Of course. Nothing is more important than you.”

Justin’s smile widened and they sat together in comfortable silence.

8. I love the way you make me feel everything else, too

It was like stars and falling and forever when they made love.

Nothing else in the world existed but them.

Wade wasn’t sure if he could tell where he ended and Justin began. He wasn’t sure if he even wanted to.

Justin felt the same.

It was the most beautiful thing to them, when they were connected in such a way that they could reach each other inside and out, could feel what the other was thinking, was feeling.

It had never been just sex with them. There was always something more, something deeper. Something unexplainable.

And those nights, when they were together, connected, lost in each other, whispering words of love, adoration, forever… those were some of their most treasured moments.

The moments where they knew, without uncertainty, that they were meant to be.

9. You love me no matter what I do

“Wow, J.”

Justin smiled sheepishly, running a hand over his newly buzzed head. “Do you like it?”

“It’s… wow, J.”

“Good wow or… bad wow?” Justin asked, a little worriedly.

“Just… wow.”

Justin frowned slightly. “Oh. Ok.”

“J, I’m just… surprised,” Wade told him, not able to tear his eyes away from Justin’s head.

Justin nodded, trying to pretend like he wasn’t upset. “Yeah, it’s cool. Don’t worry about it.”

“No, Justin…”

“I have hats and bandannas, I can just wear those. Not a problem.”

“Justin…”

“It’s really ok if you hate it, I mean, my hair grows back fast enough, I-”

“Justin!”

Justin stopped talking and looked at Wade.

“Justin, I didn’t mean for you to take it like that. I don’t hate it. It’s just something completely different from your curls, I need a minute to get used to it.”

Justin nodded, looking down.

“Justin… please don’t think that I hate it. I don’t. In fact…” Wade tilted Justin’s chin up. “I think it makes you look very, very sexy.”

Justin gave him a small smile. “Really?”

Wade nodded. “Really. I’m not just saying it. It’s very… very attractive. See for yourself.” Wade motioned down to his crotch, where a slight bulge had formed.

Justin’s face brightened. “Well… maybe since that’s my fault, I should take care of it?”

“Please do.”

And with a grin, Justin did just that.

10. I love you for a million other reasons that I could spend my whole life writing down and still never finish. I love you with all of my heart, and I feel so lucky that you return that love. I could never want anyone else in my life. You are the only one I want. The only person who leaves me breathless, speechless, and totally, completely lost… in you. The only person that I love. That I ever will love. And that will never, ever change. Whatever you decide to do with this list, just remember what it said. Remember that no matter what, I will always love you.

“Wow,” Wade said softly, setting the list down.

He stood up, making his way downstairs, the list still reeling in his mind. He walked into the kitchen and saw Justin sitting at the table, sipping a cup of coffee, reading the newspaper. It was such a normal sight that Wade just stopped and stared at him.

“Sleep good?” Justin asked after a moment, not taking his eyes off of the paper.

“Y…yeah. I did. Fine. I uh… I got your list.”

Justin looked over at Wade and smiled slightly. “Did you?”

Wade nodded. “I… did that take you all night?”

Justin shook his head. “About a minute.”

“Then why didn’t you…”

“Well, I sat up for a while, thinking of what I could do to make you feel better. Then I thought of the list, and so I wrote that, went upstairs, and left it for you. Then I started to watch a movie downstairs and I fell asleep on the couch.”

“Oh. I thought… you were mad at me, and you didn’t want to come to bed.”

Justin shook his head and smiled. “No, I wasn’t mad.”

“I was a jerk to you last night. I‘m sorry.”

Justin motioned for Wade to come sit next to him. “No, you weren’t. People have bad days, it’s not a crime.”

“Still, you were just trying to help.”

“Wade, it’s ok.”

“I still feel bad. And then you… make me that list, and it made me think of all these moments we‘ve had together, and I just… I love you. So much.”

Justin smiled at Wade. “I love you too.”

“Thank you,” Wade told him.

“Well, I expect you to cook me breakfast as payment. I’m getting pretty hungry,” Justin said jokingly.

“So what, you want me to pour the milk into your cereal bowl?”

“Ooh, you’re a brat,” Justin said with a laugh, getting up.

“I’m your brat, though,” Wade told him with a grin.

Justin smiled. “That you are. Still doesn’t get you off the hook for not fixing me breakfast.”

Wade laughed. “I’ll make it up to you somehow.”